Dear Mr. Weather…man,
Why does it always have to pour when it rains, and I’m not speaking metaphorically either?? Enough is ENOUGH already! For the past week you’ve insisted on invading my life with cloudy, gloomy and rainy weather, and I’m fed up with it! It has greatly impeded on my ability to write, do chores and exercise… It has not only “poured” on me, but now you are affecting my pets. Do you have any idea what a large long-haired tabby cat looks like soaking wet? I can assure you it is not a pretty sight; but even the “demon cat” Neko has the urge to go outside, regardless of the torrential downpours you sending our direction. Now Cosmo however, you’ve managed to scare half to death with the noise you call thunder and lightning, so now he’s afraid to even do his business outdoors; hence the lovely little packages I’ve received at the front door!
Listen up….It’s about time for some NEW RULES!
- No more raining cats and dogs!! It’s not a very nice thing to do!
- No the old man is not snoring, when it’s raining and pouring; he has sleep apnea, duh!
- No bowling after hours! 1:00 a.m. in the morning is not a proper time, for this type of activity. And while I’m on the subject stop telling everyone it’s bowling and strikes “upstairs” in the first place; I’m not picking up those pins or the tree limbs, or anything else that comes with the wind you throw into the mix!
- Spring/April showers are just that, pay more attention to your calendar it’s JULY…geez!!
- Finally, (for now anyway), if you think that the threat of flooding, and rain is going to stop me from grilling on the
4th of July, you are seriously mistaken! Come hell or high water and hurricane force winds, I WILL be starting up the ole BBQ; even if I have to stand there with hubby’s extra-large golf umbrella, hovering over the grill with rubber boots on my feet, in 2+ feet of swamp water; that was once my backyard. I WILL BE cooking up some burgers and steaks!
Now if you have any problem with this…..take a number and stand in line, you’ll be waiting for a long time!!
One soaked neighbor-Kat
P.S. I will be sending you a bill for water damages……