Dear Mr. Weather Man

Dear Mr. Weather…man,

I have a bone to pick with you!

I have a bone to pick with you!

Why does it always have to pour when it rains, and I’m not speaking metaphorically either??  Enough is ENOUGH already!  For the past week you’ve insisted on invading my life with cloudy, gloomy and rainy weather, and I’m fed up with it!  It has greatly impeded  on my ability to write, do chores and exercise…   It has not only “poured” on me, but now you are affecting my pets.  Do you have any idea what a large long-haired tabby cat looks like soaking wet?  I can assure you it is not a pretty sight; but even the “demon cat” Neko has the urge to go outside, regardless of the torrential downpours you sending our direction.   Now Cosmo however, you’ve managed to scare half to death with the noise you call thunder and lightning, so now he’s afraid to even do his business outdoors; hence the lovely little packages I’ve received at the front door!

Listen up….It’s about time for some NEW RULES!

  • No more raining cats and dogs!!  It’s not a very nice thing to do!

    No more raining cats and dog.

    No more raining cats and dogs.

  • No the old man is not snoring, when it’s raining and pouring; he has sleep apnea, duh!
  • No bowling after hours!  1:00 a.m. in the morning is not a proper time, for this type of activity.  And while I’m on the subject stop telling everyone it’s bowling and strikes “upstairs”  in the first place; I’m not picking up those pins or the tree limbs, or anything else that comes with the wind you throw into the mix!
  • Spring/April showers are just that, pay more attention to your calendar it’s JULY…geez!!
  • Finally, (for now anyway), if you think that the threat of flooding, and rain is going to stop me from grilling on the
    Find another bowling alley

    Find another bowling alley!

    4th of July, you are seriously mistaken!  Come hell or high water and hurricane force winds, I WILL be starting up the ole BBQ; even if I have to stand there with hubby’s extra-large golf umbrella, hovering over the grill with rubber boots on my feet, in 2+ feet of swamp water; that was once my backyard.  I WILL BE cooking up some burgers and steaks!

Now if you have any problem with this…..take a number and stand in line, you’ll be waiting for a long time!!

I shall Grill!

I shall grill!

Sincerely,

One soaked neighbor-Kat

P.S.  I will be sending you a bill for water damages……

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About magyarok27

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This entry was posted in Daily Dose, Humor and Satire and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Dear Mr. Weather Man

  1. Poor you. You sound as fed up of the weather as I do. http://scottishmomus.wordpress.com/2013/06/26/scottish-summers/
    I had high hopes for this year. But it has been raining since the schools broke up last week.
    My husband assures me that tomorrow is to be ‘nice’. I don’t want nice. I want sunshine and lots of it. For tomorrow and the next day and for the months that can reasonably be called Summer.
    Good luck for July 4th. Happy Independence day. Hope it shines.x

    • magyarok27 says:

      Poor Cosmo and Neko too….lol! Yeah, what can I do other then turn it around into a little satire. Either that or crawl into a closet! 🙂 Thanks I hope it shines too!

  2. draliman says:

    Oh no, sounds awful 😦
    I hope it clears up for your 4th July.
    It’s raining here as well, but it’s not pouring as such – it’s “mizzle”, a common rain in Cornwall, A mixture of mist and drizzle, as you may have guessed! This is hot on the heals of a news story which promised a blazing hot July. Major jinx.

    • magyarok27 says:

      I think the “weather man” may have been listening after all, the sun has peeked through the clouds, now we wait and see how long it lasts! 🙂

  3. In which state do you live? i love rain.

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